Another day in Hell

Things do seem to be going from good to bad and I don't realy know why. Yesterday I did nothing - spending most of the morning in bed and the afternoon watching TV. The evning was better as we went to the monthy smart meating. It was good to get out of the house.
But today seems to be worce, I got up and had a walk - Much better - Then wrote some thoughts down (see below) wich was very good, Then packed up some bits that we have sold on ebay, But sitting in the back of my mind was the desire to harm my self, I just can not get rid of it at the moment. I am off out as I just think staying round the home is going to end in spilt blood!

Dreams

Dreams,
How do you tell,
The vague imaginings of the hart,
From the tantalizing deceptions of the mind.

Why is it,
That I hang tight to the fools gold,
And discard the precious gems,
That would lead me through these dark times.

How do you willow,
The chaff from the seed,
And store up that which will,
Grow into reality.

True dreams are not easy to archive,
And may not be reached,
But provide inspiration and drive,
That propel me upwards.

False dreams deceive,
They tangle about me,
And tether my sole, secretly,
In the depths of hell.